Common Triggers
- →Public failure or mistakes
- →Being criticized or reprimanded
- →Perceived moral transgressions
- →Comparing oneself to others and falling short
- →Revealing personal secrets
- →Feeling exposed or vulnerable in social situations
Physical Sensations
- •Tightness in the chest
- •Flushing of the face
- •Sinking feeling in the stomach
- •Avoiding eye contact
- •Feeling heavy or weighed down
- •Nausea
Working with This Emotion
Recognize
Shame can be recognized by physical sensations like a tight chest, flushed face, and a sinking feeling in the stomach. Facial expressions might include avoiding eye contact or looking down. Behavioral signs include withdrawing from social interactions or becoming overly defensive.
Understand
Common causes of shame include public failures, perceived moral transgressions, and being criticized by others. It can also arise from internal standards that are not met, leading to feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness.
Label
To precisely label shame, focus on the deep sense of personal failure and worthlessness. Distinguish it from guilt (feeling bad about a specific action) and embarrassment (feeling uncomfortable in a social situation).
Express
Healthy ways to express shame include acknowledging your feelings to a trusted friend or therapist, practicing self-compassion, and engaging in activities that boost your self-esteem.
Regulate
Strategies to regulate shame include mindfulness practices, cognitive restructuring to challenge negative self-talk, and seeking support from loved ones. Grounding techniques like deep breathing can also help manage the physical sensations.
Using Inner
Using Inner, you can track patterns of shame by journaling about when and why it arises. Pay attention to physical sensations like tightness in the chest or a sinking feeling in the stomach. Explore regulation strategies such as self-compassion exercises or talking to a trusted friend to process your feelings.
Try Inner for FreeSources & References
- —RULER Framework (Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence)
- —Plutchik's Wheel of Emotions
- —Geneva Emotion Wheel
- —Lisa Feldman Barrett - How Emotions Are Made
Related Content
Embarrassment
A feeling of self-consciousness, shame, or awkwardness.
Humiliation
The action of humiliating someone or the state of being humiliated.
Worthlessness
The state of having no value or usefulness.
Inner Critic
The internalized critical voice that harshly judges, shames, and undermines self-worth.
Toxic Shame
A pervasive, identity-level sense of being fundamentally flawed or defective, distinct from healthy guilt.
House
A dwelling structure, often representing the self, security, or different aspects of personality.